How many 5-year-olds could you take in a fight?

[Daishi]

Find out here. (http://www.howmanyfiveyearoldscouldyoutakeinafight.com/)

I could K.O. 22 of these tykes. What about you?

[Chuckie]

Your weak, I can waste 30 of the little bastards.

Edit: Me Wife is weak too...she can only take out 9 of the rug rats.

[Desolator12]

I got a 22 also. Now, as long as those kids aren't Agent Smith, I'm fine.

[Nilsog]

31- Thats right, don't **** with me, kiddies.

[Derek]

Lol, someone else has been reading GR.org too :p

I got 20.

[Daishi]

Nope. /b/.

[Nod Fanatic]

26, although, I'm not really sure about my answers to some of the questions. Is punching a punching bag all day considered martial arts? :p

[Nilsog]

Nope. /b/.
Rules 1 and... nevermind.

[Daishi]

Rules 1 and... nevermind.
Those two rules only apply to raids.

[Nilsog]

Those two rules only apply to raids.
I was being facetious, I know the rules :p

[Tomahawk]

35. I want to go to a playground now. :evil:

[YuriRuler90]

Those two rules only apply to raids.

Pft, newfag. :p

You could take on 28 five year old kids in a fight.

[Derek]

/b/tards :p

[SgtRicko]

Am I the only one on theese boards who has actually had the experience of doing this in real life? Just curious.



Oh and BTW, just in case if you are thinking I am some sort of big jerkass for picking on five-year old kids, realize that this particular event happened when I was 12 in a kindergartner Christmas play acting the role of Santa himself (they chose me due to my weight and ability to act and sound like the 'real thing'). After the play was over, I was heading to the restrooms so as to get some air and take a whiz, but unfortunately some of the kids decided to "follow Santa to see his reindeer" only to find me at a bathroom stall with my beard off. What happened next can only be described as me trying to fight off five enraged kids who kept screaming "you're a FAKE! you're a FAKE!" while still in the middle of doing my business at the bathroom stall. Thankfully, one of the male school aides who happened to be near the area heard the commotion and came in to break it up and save my ass.

[Daishi]

Whoa, no call to turn that into a holiday movie... How many could you take on now, though?

My little brother got a 35. I think he cheated. :|

[SunnyInc.]

I could take way out way more than thirty-four of the little buggers before I was knocked out. Do you have any idea how weak five year olds are? Their only real weapon is their ability to bite and that wouldn't get them to far if you were constantly moving/swinging two other five year old around violently. The only thing that'd stop me from culling hundreds of the little pricks is stamina. When I eventually collapsed from exhaustion they'd have to form a human pyramid and get one of the fat ones to jump from the top onto my head to knock me out..

:p

Edit: I put way too much thought into this.

[Chuckie]

God forbid if your ever allowed to breed :D

[SgtRicko]

Whoa, no call to turn that into a holiday movie... How many could you take on now, though?

My little brother got a 35. I think he cheated. :|

According to the quiz, 24... though in all honesty, I'd say about 11-14 before my morality and lack of stamina get to me.

[SunnyInc.]

Eh, I'm kind of keen to give it a whirl now. Excuse me while I look up my local day care centre...

:evil:

[kyle]

19, I'm proud of my low score

[Chuckie]

I'm sure your gonna be saying that when that little sawed off street urchin is breaking his 5 year old leg off in your ass :rockbrow:

[kyle]

haha, I doubt I would ever be attacked by a bunch of 5 year olds.

[brookie]

Yes, I'm stronger than my mom. I can take 12 little rugrats.
EDIT:I'm also stronger than my sister too.

[SiDeWiNdEr]

Apparently I could take 26 of the gits.

::Shrug::

[Derek]

I could take way out way more than thirty-four of the little buggers before I was knocked out. Do you have any idea how weak five year olds are? Their only real weapon is their ability to bite and that wouldn't get them to far if you were constantly moving/swinging two other five year old around violently. The only thing that'd stop me from culling hundreds of the little pricks is stamina. When I eventually collapsed from exhaustion they'd have to form a human pyramid and get one of the fat ones to jump from the top onto my head to knock me out..
You see, this is the mistake that everyone makes. You assume you're just going to be fighting one or two of the little buggers at a time, and you can take them out with a punch or kick or something. What you fail to realise is that 5 years olds are herd animals, and as such never attack individually. You will be swarmed with as many as can fit around the circumfrence of your body at one time, and while you're kicking or punching the ones in the front, others will be climbing on top of your back. You may be able to shake off one, but if two get a good grip, it will leave you open for all the other kids to pile on top of you and eventually their combined weight will drag you down and crush/suffocate you. They key is to make sure they cannot start piling on to you.

And yes, I know all this from experience.

[Neo]

w00t 34 for me. :)

[SgtRicko]

You see, this is the mistake that everyone makes. You assume you're just going to be fighting one or two of the little buggers at a time, and you can take them out with a punch or kick or something. What you fail to realise is that 5 years olds are herd animals, and as such never attack individually. You will be swarmed with as many as can fit around the circumfrence of your body at one time, and while you're kicking or punching the ones in the front, others will be climbing on top of your back. You may be able to shake off one, but if two get a good grip, it will leave you open for all the other kids to pile on top of you and eventually their combined weight will drag you down and crush/suffocate you. They key is to make sure they cannot start piling on to you.

And yes, I know all this from experience.

ROFLMAO!!!:lol::rofl::lmao:

Well, Derek, I guess we do have some personal traumas in common after all, eh???:p

[Avapodnaught]

28 for me, but I guess just because it assumes that you need martial arts to be better at taking out kids, where a full fist rampage would do right at the heads, tripping, aiming for the eyes, and of course jump kicking :evil:

I have a special knuckle technique ever since I broke my two wrists that is really concentrated and powerful, and very reusable ;) :evil:

[Gaucho8788]

28 for me.

[Star Wars Man]

WOO! 42! WHAT NOW?!?!

(Though I can probably take on about 10 before I decided, "What the **** am I doing? I've got better things to do. :|)

[Tomahawk]

I think the best way to combat a horde of 5 year olds is to use the same method one would use when fighting zombies. Carry a chainsaw or shotgun and aim for the head.

[Nod Fanatic]

Well really, a thought came to me. How much does the average 5-year-old weigh?

[SunnyInc.]

You see, this is the mistake that everyone makes. You assume you're just going to be fighting one or two of the little buggers at a time, and you can take them out with a punch or kick or something. What you fail to realise is that 5 years olds are herd animals, and as such never attack individually. You will be swarmed with as many as can fit around the circumfrence of your body at one time, and while you're kicking or punching the ones in the front, others will be climbing on top of your back. You may be able to shake off one, but if two get a good grip, it will leave you open for all the other kids to pile on top of you and eventually their combined weight will drag you down and crush/suffocate you. They key is to make sure they cannot start piling on to you.

And yes, I know all this from experience.

Every year my rugby club encourages us to volunteer to help coach the junior teams from our brother club. Last year I decided to help out and I ended up coaching a couple of U7 teams for a couple of sessions. I decided the best way to teach them to tackle would be to throw them in the deep end and get them to tackle me. So, what I'd do at the end of every session is get them (there numbers lay in the mid twenties) to scatter around the in-goal box and try to tackle me as I jogged through. These guys were swarming me and I was just jogging really lightly - not trying to knock them out or fend them off - and they couldn't take me down. I think you've underestimated how seriously weak these kids are, Derek.

The point of all that is that six year olds are seriously weak and five year olds are even weaker. If I was able to jog lightly through a pack of six year olds, for a good ten minutes, without trying to hurt them or defend myself; any number of five year olds who I was trying to K.O. would stand no chance. Especially if I gathered any amount of momentum. Their combined weight would mean nothing because it's so easy to throw two or three of them out of the way at a time.

If I got any amount of momentum I'd be able to trample any amount of five year olds and would be able to shake off any of the one's who managed to find their way onto my back before another one was able to get up there...


WOO! 42! WHAT NOW?!?!

(Though I can probably take on about 10 before I decided, "What the **** am I doing? I've got better things to do. :|)

Thats a lie.

Well really, a thought came to me. How much does the average 5-year-old weigh?

The average five year old should weigh no more than 40 pounds.

[Avapodnaught]

I've been thinking about the test and for those people who got such numbers in 1 (granted if possible) - 20 in life and death situations against 30 or more would they die?
What I am saying is that is the test really plausible?
Not imo...

I come to that conclusion because I doubt that if you could kill 20 five year olds that 21 would be that different because if you took the test and really only could kill 20 and you could beat up 20 or else you faced 21 and died...



Its a sad story when you were winning while you were beating up 20 little five year olds and then another came to turn the tides :rofl:



Edit: By the way, I know you lied SWM, the maximum number you can attain is 40...
But I bet that doesn't mean that 40 or more neccessarily will be able to kill you
What about if he tried the test outdoors but that was all there was available to him Sunny? :evil:

[SunnyInc.]

But I bet that doesn't mean that 40 or more neccessarily will be able to kill you
What about if he tried the test outdoors but that was all there was available to him Sunny? :evil:

First of all, the goal is to K.O. them before they K.O. you, it isn't to kill them before they kill you. Secondly, I meant the best possible result a person could attain on the test was 39, I didn't mean thats the most five year olds he'd be able to get round up in real life...

[Derek]

Clearly they were not jumping all over you, because once you've got a couple kids on your back you know its not easy to just throw them off. Its not about they're muscle strength, they've got none of that to speak of, its just their shear body weight combined with universal gravitation that ensures that the little runts will eventually drag you down.

[SunnyInc.]

Clearly they were not jumping all over you, because once you've got a couple kids on your back you know its not easy to just throw them off. Its not about they're muscle strength, they've got none of that to speak of, its just their shear body weight combined with universal gravitation that ensures that the little runts will eventually drag you down.

That's the thing though, they can't jump that high and they're going to have a great degree of difficulty climbing you if you're running at pace whilst fisting the little buggers in the head..

[Nod Fanatic]

That's the thing though, they can't jump that high and they're going to have a great degree of difficulty climbing you if you're running at pace whilst fisting the little buggers in the head..
What about if they're shoulder-to-shoulder in the room?

[Trevorrex]

19, I suppose that's what I get for being honest in my answers.

[SunnyInc.]

What makes you think the rest of us (with the exception of SWM) weren't?

[SirSnake]

32 apparently.


Mind you thats without the use of psychological warfare!

A few well made comments about not getting christmas presents and telling them they are all adopted and their real parents hate them.....

Crying 5-year olds are easy to hit!

:lol:

[Derek]

Yes, but you'll note that the survey specifically says that these kids are "merciless and show no fear". I think implicit in that is that they are immune to psychological trickery :p

That's the thing though, they can't jump that high and they're going to have a great degree of difficulty climbing you if you're running at pace whilst fisting the little buggers in the head..
Well, as long as you kept moving you'ld be alright, but you would tire soon. These kids on the other hand...

[Daishi]

This would make a great game show.

[SunnyInc.]

Well, as long as you kept moving you'ld be alright, but you would tire soon. These kids on the other hand...

I said in my initial post that stamina would be a key factor...

...still, I reckon you'd be able to take down a couple of hundred with your knees and fists as you ran. As soon as you were moving slow enough for them to start climbing up on you fast enough for you to not be able to shake them off, then you'd be in a spot of trouble..

:dead:

[Nod Fanatic]

This would make a great game show.
Yes, yes it would. *Starts thinking about the possibilities*

[Derek]

...still, I reckon you'd be able to take down a couple of hundred with your knees and fists as you ran. As soon as you were moving slow enough for them to start climbing up on you fast enough for you to not be able to shake them off, then you'd be in a spot of trouble..
If you're moving fast enough to keep them off you, I don't think you would be able to simultaneously take them down. Its a one-or-the-other situation imo, which is why you still aren't going to get more than a few dozen at best.

[Chuckie]

It would all boil down to a function of mass. Simply find the fattest 5 year old and procede to use him/her as a club.
I wonder if getting him/her wet would be considered cheating?
I know from past trials that a wet cat will go further when kicked, it stands to reason that a wet mommas boy/girl should transfer more energy than a dry one when used as a blunt instrument.

[Tomahawk]

I suddenly have the urge to see how far I can drop-kick a 5 year old. :|

[Chuckie]

Wet or dry?

[Derek]

It would all boil down to a function of mass. Simply find the fattest 5 year old and procede to use him/her as a club.
I wonder if getting him/her wet would be considered cheating?
I know from past trials that a wet cat will go further when kicked, it stands to reason that a wet mommas boy/girl should transfer more energy than a dry one when used as a blunt instrument.
Actually you would want to find a lighter weight kid. Faster>Heavier (proportionally) when it comes to hitting things.

[Avapodnaught]

19, I suppose that's what I get for being honest in my answers.
But I consider that a bad thing if you were attacked by something that had the same strength and army of Five-year olds...

They don't have to be five-year olds exactly ;);)

This means we are going down in shape people

(how exactly do you get knocked out by teeny repeated blows to the head that just won't stop with some annoying little kid noises to drown you to sleep, I wonder... :dunce:)

I forget the point of this test as I would probably just run from such a large army of little kids or just try and fight through them if I had to...

[Annihlator :D]

I can take on 27 kids at once....... fear me :rolleyes:

[ShirlApEs]

14 kids.
but that's probably because I answerd "that is so wrong..." on the morality question :p

[wargrudge]

Meh, I got 33. But why would the little turds wanna fight me in the first place, I'm awesome.

:p

[Chuckie]

Your cup runeth over :lol:

[apple23]

I can KO 24 5-year-olds, but why does that matter? I would still lose in a fight with someone my size :p

And also, sunny's right the max appears to be 39

[C4]

At least 30 of them should fear me.
Anyway i must agree with Sunny for once. Some well placed kicks and knee-in-the-face-while-running should suffice to bring down 2 dozens.
The key is not letting yourself be surrounded by all sides at the same time. Don't wait. Charge on and exploit weak points.

I'd be looking for some neighbor kids to do the testing. I'll take photos to bring, if that is.:evil:


Edit: f***, just realised who old this thread is. Sorry for the bump. I just live in ZH forums and only here and then i do some lurking elsewhere. :) Nice thread anyways.

Edit: Hey, nice neg rep Sunny! U're just adorable! ...as always!

[Alpha and Omega]

/b/tards :p

This is now /k/ommando territory...gb2/n/...oh wait...

Also...sage.

[Jester Kirby]

LOL, dude that is one of the funniest surveys I have ever taken! :lol:

I got 22

Edit: Bleh, pay attention to dates Jest, bumping something with 2 months old sorry :( lol I'm not used to the first page having old threads.